On the other hand, I guess I could just wear a tarp from now on

It doesn’t take a new parent long to learn that it’s not a question of if your kid’s going to throw up all over you, but a question of when, and how often. The chalkboard in our kitchen, for example, read “10 days without a puking” until about an hour ago.

There’s no way to predict it, let alone stop it, but there are certain things you can do to prepare for it. This evening, I discovered that it’s a lot easier to deal with getting thrown up on when you’re not wearing a shirt; all you need to do is wipe yourself down once you’ve tended to your kid. Of all the times I’ve been puked on, this one was definitely the easiest!

Admittedly, “don’t wear a shirt anymore” isn’t the most feasible idea I’ve ever had. And yes, the only reason why I wasn’t wearing a shirt in the first place was because it wasn’t the first time my daughter had puked on me this evening.

But listen, the point is I learned something tonight. Something that just might make me a better father, or at least a better smelling one. That’s got to count for something, right?

Say, you guys would tell me if you ever thought I was overdoing it with the disgusting dad stories, right? Either in words, or in rapidly declining blog traffic? Either one will do.

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